“For pride is spiritual cancer: it eats up the very possibility of love, of contentment, or even common sense.” –C.S. Lewis

Absalom was known as the most cunning, handsome, and ambitious of David’s sons. The Bible describes him in 2 Samuel 14:25 saying, “Now Absalom was praised as the most handsome man in all Israel. He was flawless from head to foot.” I don’t know about you, but that seems like a pretty important image to uphold. Many might crumble under the weight of such acknowledgement, but Absalom thrived on it. Of all the things Absalom could have been known for, he desired to be recognized by popularity, wealth, beauty, and status.

In reading about Absalom, I found myself shocked and even disappointed that someone would value those things above the internal, the everlasting. But then, I reflect on my own life and see more of myself in Absalom than I even want to admit.

Absalom stole the hearts of many people; he gained their trust and their favor, yet for all the wrong reasons. His aim was not to be genuine and kind, but to have power and recognition. There are numerous instances in my life where I become so caught up in what people think of me, what they say about me, and how they respond to me, that I totally disregard who I am and don an unrealistic version of myself just to win their approval. Rather than focusing on important values, such as inward beauty, I become wrapped up in things that hold no significance, like money, outward appearance, and status. All of this stems from the sin of pride.

“There are numerous instances in my life where I become so caught up in what people think of me, what they say about me, and how they respond to me, that I totally disregard who I am and don an unrealistic version of myself just to win their approval.”

It seems that this is a common thread amongst my age group. College age and twenty-somethings are encouraged by our culture to be self-promoting and self-serving, and are taught that any sign of weakness can be detrimental to popularity, image, or status. For some reason this generation also has this crazy belief that we are rarely wrong, and because people fear “tainting our confidence,” we are seldom corrected. As a result, there are many walking around with enormous egos and the inability to digest constructive criticism in any way.

Absalom had just that, an enormous ego in addition to a thirst for power. He was handsome and determined, but that was not enough for him. He also craved the power of his father’s throne and was unwavering in his attempt to become king of Israel. His life is an example of what happens when we are unsatisfied with what we have and seek to obtain more and more. Beauty and power, if used correctly, are not bad things. However, they can be easily abused. This was the case with Absalom, who allowed his appearance and power to ruin him, entangling him in vanity. He was so caught up in the external and fleeting, yet completely missed out on what is truly important.

In the midst of his fame, I can imagine Absalom looking at his handsome reflection thinking, “I am wildly important and I will go places. I will climb the ladder of success all the way to the top.” I know you are bombarded with temptations to call attention to yourself so others will take notice. Whether it is to draw the attention of someone you’re interested in, land a certain job with a high paying salary, or become the next president of an organization, we all face moments where we want all of the attention on us, going to great lengths to be sure that happens. However, it is necessary to examine our motives. Are we really hoping for certain circumstances in order to use them to glorify God, or is it to turn the attention back on ourselves?

“So many times I become too engrossed in things that are momentary, when I really should be focusing on the condition of my heart.”

So many times I become too engrossed in things that are momentary, when I really should be focusing on the condition of my heart. There are days I spend more time looking in the mirror than in the Word. There are times I spew boastful words rather than those of grace and humility.  There are even instances that I look to others to uplift me rather than believing and trusting the words of the Lord.

Pride does not look good on anyone. It ruins true beauty—the kind of beauty that does not fade. It turns the spotlight on self and uses the stepping stones of others to bring glory and attention to your own successes. This is not how I want to be known or thought of by anyone. I want to be known for being humble and genuine, as well as kind and sensitive to the needs of others. So as I read the story of Absalom, I am prompted to take another look at my own heart and take active steps toward fighting the temptations of drawing attention to myself and  becoming ensnared by the sin of pride.

May we be cautious to not give our pride and lust for recognition the power to ruin us like it did Absalom. Absalom may have been the most handsome man in Israel, but his sin of pride allowed his good looks and popularity to go to his head. Pride will continue to grow as we feed it. When we entertain one enticement it will only lead us further from God’s will. We all know people with big heads and little spirits, but today let’s remember the words from James 4:6, “And he gives grace generously. As the Scriptures say, ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Let’s walk in that truth.