14 Oct Personal Stories | Two Hearts, One Mission
When Randy and I were asked to write about adventure, we thought, “what could we possibly say about it to be of any help?” There was no grand plan in the beginning of our marriage to have “adventure” in our life. Like romance in our culture, which is mostly unrealistic, we could easily write about adventurous moments that might entertain and portray only the positive, but that is not the reality of our path. Our journey, because of risks taken and sorrows experienced, has taught us to cling toward each other and has given us direction to move forward.
“…it is clear to me that for Randy and I this exciting, challenging journey we have shared has been, and always will be, a mission that came from two hearts desiring to follow God by pursuing a relationship with Him and each other.”
My adventure started with a look and a thought that Randy had the characteristics to be a good husband and father, and he had goals. These thoughts were about a young man whom I worked with that became my friend. Looking back, I realize that we did not have any idea about what we were beginning or what our life would entail. Even as I type these words, it is clear to me that for Randy and I this exciting, challenging journey we have shared has been, and always will be, a mission that came from two hearts desiring to follow God by pursuing a relationship with Him and each other. This simply has been our compass.
From our dating years, God brought together two very “Type A” individuals with significantly different backgrounds, homes, and spiritual lifestyles. Randy came from a broken home with a lot of instability in his younger years with little knowledge about Christ. I grew up in the “all-American” home where we ate dinner at 5:15pm every night, lived in the same house, and all my friends went to church with me. Despite these differences and all of the individual brokenness brought into our marriage, at the core of who we were as a couple was an idea of creating a life together fashioned around being on a mission for the Lord. Randy was committed to changing the broken patterns of his family’s legacy. Although I grew up in the “all-American” home, my own father did not come to know Christ until 57, and I wanted to improve on the loving home that I grew up in where commitment to each other was a given.
Little did I know at the time that this young man would eventually take me (the girl who had lived all her life in the same house) on an adventure that included ten different moves, ten different churches, and seven different states called home. Together we endured war, two plus years of separation and many absent holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries. Despite these hardships, it was this sense of mission and our desire for each other that aided us, and along the way we learned more about ourselves. These were difficult years because I had the culture’s view of what a romantic life was supposed to be and had placed Randy on a pedestal that no human man should stand on. But the constantly changing environments that came with his career as a military pilot taught us about the fragility and brevity of life, and as a result, we learned more about what it meant to be one. True open communication became easier for us because we could not waste time, and a level of trust began to develop between a “spunky” woman and a very driven young man. These conversations, while many came with sparks, brought security and vulnerability. Even though those times were difficult and stressful, God took us to a place, and still does, where we can only finish if we hang on to Him for strength.
“Despite these hardships, it was this sense of mission and our desire for each other that aided us, and along the way we learned more about ourselves.”
We have learned that sometimes we get to pick the adventure, and sometimes it picks us. Life has brought us on many adventures—the blessings of children, the hardship of raising a son with a non-verbal learning disorder, the task of creating an intentional environment for laughter and fun (sometimes created through “Forced Family Fun Nights”), learning to find contentment and joy in just sharing life together, and even pursuing a business venture together in owning two Chick-fil-A restaurants. Our adventure has included some bold moves that haven’t always made sense. But through it all, we are continuing to learn, listen and follow what God is leading us to do, and this has drawn us together even more. Sometimes clarity is not present and the path forward can be downright scary, but in the midst of our journey, God has used these opportunities to teach dependence upon Him and has galvanized our marriage in the process. God has been more graceful than we deserve and has deepened our love for one another on our adventure where we are becoming more of one than two in Christ.
-The Goffs
As part of our One series, we’ve asked several people to share some of their experiences and stories as it relates to each sermon topic and how it has played out in their marriage or in their life. We appreciate the Goffs taking the time to share some of the hardships and struggles they’ve overcome on their marriage adventure and how God has been at the center of it all. Has the One series prompted any questions you would like addressed? We’d love to answer some in a Q&A at the end of the series. Email questions to [email protected].