To Not Lose Heart

“So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. for the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” (2 Corinthians 4:16-18, ESV)

It’s ironic. This verse caught my eye around two years ago, and I began to quote it as one of my favorites. The ideas of a future hope and an “eternal weight of glory” struck me as profoundly valuable. I started to believe that our thoughts about eternity affect our here and now much more than we normally give them credit.

The irony of my journey with this passage is that I came to cling to these ideas long before I had much opportunity to live them out. At the time, the challenges in my life were nearly nonexistent. This past fall, that began to change. I was able to pursue an opportunity to live overseas; even as a child, I had been drawn to the ideas of caring for orphans and living in Africa. Both of these things became a reality for me in September as I moved to Kenya to work with the orphans and vulnerable children program that Grace supports.

The rosiness of my dreams were soon challenged by the realities of living cross-culturally. It wasn’t easy. I experienced many new emotions as my idealized view of the world came crashing down.

One evening, about two weeks into my three month stay, I found myself crumpled on the floor of my home in tears. The desperation and aloneness of those weeks weighed on my heart; I could not navigate the confusion and lack of hope that I felt. And in that moment, I heard these verses in 2 Corinthians whispered to me: “Do not lose heart…”

The truth of this passage became my anchor over my remaining months in Africa. I wrote it in giant letters and hung it on my wall. I quoted it to myself every morning as I woke up and again felt the weight of my daily challenges. My hope began to shift from an idea I talked about and became a daily reality for me.

“The rosiness of my dreams were soon challenged by the realities of living cross-culturally.”

You see, my time away began to reveal where my confidence had truly been placed. Outside of my normal context, I found myself living out of my control and out of my comfort zone. Each day I had to choose not to insist on my rights; comfort and control are not things I’m entitled to have.

Living in a new culture where I did not know the language, the customs, or even how to complete daily tasks forced me to depend on others. My pride took a hit as I re-learned how to do almost everything. When I first arrived I had to depend on others for things like grocery shopping, transportation, and cooking- simple tasks that, I realized, had contributed to my false confidence in my own control.

This lack of independence in my physical life taught me the important spiritual truth of dependence on God. My day-to-day activities revealed how tightly I held on to control. When I lost my grip on this, I realized how little power I actually have over life. I was driven to depend on God in new and tangible ways.

I began to see that putting my hope in the eternal meant dependence on God. Ultimately, I cannot control this life- my relationships, my health, my social status, or any other daily realities. I stopped believing the lie that I had power of these things, and I looked beyond them. If Paul could describe his experiences as “light and momentary afflictions”, then I could certainly do the same.

My initial despair was transformed by the gospel. The little frustrations of daily life and the monumental tragedies are all under the control of our loving Father. When I look at the cross, I am reminded of all He has already done. I find peace in the truth this demonstrates. I’m confident, because I trust that our afflictions truly are light and momentary when held up in the light of the glorious eternity that is ours in Christ Jesus.

Think about a current struggle in your life. What is the Lord revealing to you during this season? How are your idols of comfort, control, approval, etc. keeping you from living out your calling as an Ezer? 

-Megan Gaminde, OVC Kenya